Some People Are Hard To Love

Jesus said we should love others like God loves us. Despite this truth, some people are hard to love. So, what do we do about that? Give up on them? Figure out why? Grin and bear it? These people are a hard problem, and I see no dogmatic answer to resolve this.  Let’s put this on the table.

Loving someone means going the extra mile to understand them rather than just judging them and walking away.

Causes can be differences in personalities, hard childhood experiences, and they are mad at us for some reason.

Different personalities is surely one. Once, I had a boss who was really irritating. I knew about the DISC system of personalities. I am a D in that system. My boss was also a D called dominant. Yet, all of his behaviors drove me crazy. I fell upon a description that shocked me. Finally, I knew that his ENTP and my ESTJ were usually mortal enemies in any business (see www.keirsey.com) as ESTJ build systems and ENTP work to destroy them to make something new. From there, we could see each other much better and face other issues.

If we can see other people’s personalities are God given and part of how God made them, we can take better steps.

Some People Are Hard To Love and Need More

Some people we have hurt, and we may need to see how we hurt them before we try to do a quick sorry. We need to do it well, and we may save a relationship.

Some people have had hard times in life and simply judging them for their bad behavior will not solve anything, We need to sensitively ask more about their background to see why they cannot be the person they want to be at this time.

We must pray and seek God in these circumstances (of course that is always true). Do not gossip, Get help. It is so hard to manage. Hold fast to God. Sometimes, we need to separate from such a person, but we must always love them.  We cannot obsess about such people as they struggle to be well. God leads them.  I think you can see that I have not linked to any Bible verse here, so cannot be dogmatic. We need wisdom and always more love from God as God loves them as they are.   May God give us wisdom and let God be God.